Depressing news

The news is depressing at the moment. Coupled with the cold weather finally arriving with a vengance, it's all very depressing. We're going to run out of fish, forever, inside of 40 years if we carry on fishing at current rates. Aside from the sign makers rubbing their hands at the thought of all those Fish and Chip shops that are going to have to be renamed, it's miserable news for the rest of us, never mind the fish.

Then there's the army. Equipment doesn't work or there isn't enough to go round and we're running out of soldiers. This is of course to be expected, as a major part of being a soldier is the bit about possibly being shot by other soldiers (the baddies, not your own, hopefully). But it's not just the ones most likely to get shot we're short of. Engineers and medical staff are thin on the ground. A lot of it seems to be down to the fact that people don't want to get shot or fight other people, both major considerations when joining the army to say the least.

 

Then there's the climate, which if we don't do something soon is going to be knackered, for real this time. No amount of popstars in the rainforest can save us, even if we set fire to them.

 

Then there's the muslims. Iraq is still a mess, Afghanistan isn't much better. A group of gunmen have taken refuge in a mosque in Gaza. Meanwhile the Israeli army are busy knocking it down to get at them. Great. Aside from the fact that these are probably not nice men, them being gunmen and all, knocking down a mosque is probably not going to help matters, is it?

 

As if all this wasn't bad enough, the BBC last night showed their new drama about terrorism, "The State Within". It's all whizzing camera work and televsion static jump-cuts. Basically, it's about what happens when an aircraft gets blown up over Washington. There's the British ambassador (Jason Isaacs) who's obviously the good guy, Cagney out of Cagney and Lacey is the US secretary of defence, who is like Madelene Allbright crossed with Sylvester Stallone.

 

There's an MI6 agent having a gay affair with one of the US defense secretarys' staff, a decorated ex-British soldier on death row and some mad British squaddies wandering round West Virginia shooting things. Then the governor of Virginia starts rounding up British muslms and locking them up and a looney bloke telling the human rights woman (forgot to mention her) trying to save the ex-British soldier on death row that he's innocent. It's bloody confusing, but my money is on the gays taking over using the looney British squaddies and muslim extremists as cover.

 

All it made me think is that I'm sick of watching drama about terrorists, whether they be on a mission from God, or inadvertant pawns in a bid for world domination by power crazed homosexuals. It's all very exciting and the production values are wonderful, and I'm sure I'll end up watching next week, but I think I'm getting terrorism fatigue. We need drama that doesn't mirror the climate of fear we're all getting so used to these days.

 

I'd like a gripping drama about people not blowing each other up, not eating too much fish, then deciding to join the army in peacetime and bringing their own weapons, perhaps set in Sweden. They could be an international team of psychics, including a gay jewish/muslim couple completely uninterested in ruling the world, that specialise in psychically inducing fish to have sex from their peaceful fjord military island, codenamed Smorgasbord. I haven't thought of a title yet, but any suggestions are welcome.